Nice Matters

Have you ever been in a hail storm or tornado?  Have you been pelted by things that after the constant barrage of well meaning criticism you simply implode or explode?  It seems that our youth are under fire with the tongues of their peers.  Our youth are killing themselves or each other as a result of the constant fire and disapproval. 

My son is 12 and has experienced the accusation of being “gay.”  He has experienced unfounded rumors that he and a friend of his kissed each other.  Lies and yet they live because our youth want to find someone to demean and demote.  Like politicians these bullies lie to make others like them because they want to be perceived as better than the victim.

Unfortunately, we live in a world that is practically run via cyberspace. Villain and non-villain, alike, have 24-hour access to this invisible world to communicate.  Unfortunately, some of these communes turn national because someone said something or did something and told the rest of the world. 

It is the atom bomb of meanness to video tape someone without their knowledge--especially a private act (I don’t care who it is with) and then post it on the internet. I feel for the family of Tyler Clementi and his friends.

Whatever happened to just being nice? 

So how do you keep children safe in a world so widely available?  In our family we try to avoid the barrage of mean-speak by making sure that the computer is in a central location where an adult is always available.  My children do not carry cell phones and they do not have their own email address.  They are only 12 and under.  As they get older this will have to change but not until I feel they can handle it appropriately.

But above all--they need to learn to be nice because nice matters!